Sip ‘n’ Speak Recap Blog: Summertime Stress Strategies for Balancing Structure and Spontaneity

Sip ‘n’ Speak Recap Blog: Summertime Stress Strategies to Balance Structure and Spontaneity with Your Gifted Kids

By Kali Fedor

Summer should be a time of renewal, connection, and fun. However, for families of gifted and twice-exceptional (2e) children, it often brings a unique blend of excitement and anxiety. At our recent Sip ‘n’ Speak session, parents gathered virtually on Zoom to share the highs and lows of navigating summer with gifted learners and to exchange practical strategies grounded in both lived experience and sound theory. We designed this session intentionally a few months before summer to help families gain knowledge, resources, and ideas to start creating a plan to balance structure and spontaneity in a way that supports their child’s intellectual growth, emotional well-being, and family harmony. We also invited Dr. Ciminy St. Clair, a board member with Supporting Emotional Needs of the Gifted (SENG) to join us for this special session.

Before we dove into all the wonderful ideas, suggestions, and strategies shared within the session, we first posed an important framing question to our group: Why Summer Is Complicated for Gifted Kids?

While many children welcome the freedom summer brings, gifted and 2e children often experience it differently. Their asynchronous development, emotional intensity, and intellectual drive can cause friction when daily life shifts away from school routines.

Some common challenges the group discussed included:

• Difficulty with unstructured time leading to boredom, anxiety, or meltdowns
• Internal or external pressure to “make the most” of summer through enrichment
• Conflict between siblings with different interests or sensitivities
• Parental stress over balancing enrichment, relaxation, and screen time
• Feelings of guilt: "Are we doing enough… or too much?"

What was interesting is all the ideas the group discussed to answer the question, directly correlate back to work of scholars like Dr. James Webb. His research on the social-emotional needs of gifted students highlights the importance of structure, predictability, and purposeful engagement in reducing anxiety and enhancing resilience (Webb et al., 2016). As the conversation continued, we found ourselves coming back to five main ideas or strategies important for families to consider when starting to plan for summer with their kids.

Idea 1: Embrace a “Loose Structure”

Many families reported success using predictable routines rather than rigid schedules. This allows for flexibility while still meeting a gifted child’s need for order.

Ideas to try:

• Morning check-ins: “What’s one thing you’d like to learn, create, or explore today?”
• Themed days: Maker Mondays, Tech Tuesdays, Wellness Wednesdays, etc.
• Visual schedules to reduce anxiety about what’s coming next
• Designated quiet hours for independent reading, journaling, or drawing

Check out The National Association for Gifted Children (NAGC) Resources for Parents for more ideas and strategies.

Idea 2: Plan in and Schedule “Intentional Boredom”

Boredom is not the enemy; it’s often a springboard for creativity. During the session, several parents talked about intentionally allowing “unscheduled” time to spark self-direction.

Suggestions included:

• A “boredom buster jar” filled with open-ended activities
• Minimalist materials like art supplies, blocks, recycled items, or nature finds
• Encouraging quiet thinking time as a valid and valuable activity

Many of the ideas and discussions again connected to research by Kaufman & Beghetto’s (2009), who created the Four C Model of Creativity, small-scale, personal creativity (Mini-c) can thrive when children are given space and trust to explore their ideas.

If you are looking for a great podcast connecting to this specific idea, consider “The Power of Boredom” episode from Brains On!

Idea 3: Sprinkle in Spontaneity

Summer is an ideal time to embrace surprise and delight. Not everything needs to be planned to be meaningful. Unscripted moments often become the most cherished.

Ideas from parents included:

• “Yes Days,” where kids set the agenda
• Backyard stargazing or spontaneous night walks
• STEM scavenger hunts or “mystery boxes” of materials
• A family “spontaneity jar” for quick ideas like ice cream runs or local adventures

Check out: Camp Galileo’s Creativity Boosters for Parents or National Geographic, Creative Kids: How to Inspire Their Growing Minds.

Idea 4: Enrichment Without Pressure

Gifted children can internalize the message that productivity equals worth. We discussed how to offer enrichment opportunities that nurture curiosity without burnout.

Best practices include:

• Letting the child lead and follow their interests, don’t dictate them
• Thinking beyond academics: cooking, storytelling, geocaching, or podcasting
• Choosing enrichment programs that balance stimulation with downtime
• Avoiding over-scheduling: one or two structured activities may be plenty

Check out: Hoagies' Gifted Education Enrichment Resource Page or Online Enrichment Resources

Idea 5: Make Room for Emotional Check-Ins

Gifted kids often experience big feelings, and those feelings don’t take summer off. Emotional check-ins create a foundation for self-regulation, resilience, and connection.

Tips shared by parents and invited experts included:

• Daily “roses and thorns” (or “highs and lows”) at dinner or bedtime
• Using drawing or storytelling to express feelings
• Modeling calm self-talk when plans go awry
• Creating “quiet corners” or sensory kits to offer a calming reset space

These approaches align with Social Emotional Learning (SEL) frameworks that emphasize self-awareness and emotional literacy skills especially critical for gifted and 2e youth navigating complexity and intensity.

Check out: CASEL’s SEL Resources for Families

A Toolkit Made by Parents, for Parents

To close our session, families offered go-to resources that keep summer both meaningful and manageable:

• Podcasts: Brains On!, But Why?, Smash Boom Best
• Audiobooks: Great for road trips or quiet afternoons (Libro.fm and Epic! are great options)
• Backyard or indoor challenges: Design a board game, build a marble run, make a Rube Goldberg machine
• Family planning tools: Create a flexible “bucket list” of shared goals—then check off as interest and energy allow

Remember, the goal isn’t perfection for summertime… It’s connection as a family.

In Closing…

Whether your family thrives on structure or prefers spontaneity, the most important takeaway is this: You know your child best. The strategies you choose don’t need to match anyone else’s, just your family’s needs, values, and capacity in the moment. We’re grateful to every parent who joined this Sip ‘n’ Speak for sharing your wisdom, vulnerability, and humor. Together, we’re building a strong, informed, and compassionate community.

If you missed our session in April, make sure to mark your calendar for July 24th at 7:00 pm for our next Sip ‘n’ Speak covering the topic of Starting the New School Year Strong: What’s on Your Wishlist? Get registered for this FREE event today by clicking here.

With appreciation and warm wishes for a joy-filled summer,

~Kali and Jessica